Hear his cackle in the Santa Clara wind? The cry of a dark, winged destroyer here to see ruination upon the cities of man?
That is the raven—the raven—and it has descended on Levi’s Stadium to terrorize workers attempting to assemble the rink for the upcoming NHL Stadium Series game between the San Jose Sharks and Los Angeles Kings.
Look at it: dead-eyed. Menacing. The size of Mothra, and twice as eager to feast on the marrow of human bones. Odin has sent down this mighty beast as an advance guard for Ragnarok and the end times. The great wolf-monster Fenrir will surely follow in its wake.
If only there was someone to protect us from this—another avian vigilante to pit against this obsidian menace.
Meet our new pigeon friend. He likes to block our remote camera to get a good view of practice. His name is Timothy.pic.twitter.com/fukK0gM6ux
— Oregon Video (@QuackVideo) October 22, 2013
It’s up to Timothy now, guys, and if he fails...well, gather what non-perishables you can and head for the caves in the hills. We will sleep by day and wage war on the raven and its army of undead White Walkers by night.
Dan is on Twitter, awaiting death from above.